Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize