Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
