names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
