That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
operation harelip BJ is a go
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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