I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
This toilet bowl is my home.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
