3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm always down for nudity.
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