plz talk dirty to me
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
