btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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