I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
time to smoke my breakfast
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize