we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
