I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Just cropdusted the office
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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