wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
last night I used snow as a chaser
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
