I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
