I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
sex in a hospital.. check
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize