Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
