hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
