the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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