Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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