You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize