you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
