woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
