So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
