it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
