I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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