saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Randomize
