No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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