i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
