guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
