Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
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there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
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our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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