I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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