so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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