i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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