So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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