Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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