put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
whose parrot is this?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
