Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
