I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
