Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
