He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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