but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
