if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
