apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
