i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize