I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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