Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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