how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize