A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
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