Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it

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  (202): Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it http://tfl.nu/amxw
  Replies (6) Good night (4681) Bad night (930)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers

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  (973): i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers http://tfl.nu/mvp5
  Replies (30) Good night (7996) Bad night (1371)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?

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  (703): I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you? http://tfl.nu/lfio
  Replies (72) Good night (21234) Bad night (3859)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.

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  (702): His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding. http://tfl.nu/4b44
  Replies (16) Good night (8428) Bad night (1066)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits

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  (662): The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits http://tfl.nu/a8f8
  Replies (15) Good night (5203) Bad night (1331)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.

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  (337): There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back. http://tfl.nu/dznq
  Replies (6) Good night (4675) Bad night (1259)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.

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  (413): i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur. http://tfl.nu/9vxg
  Replies (11) Good night (5843) Bad night (1262)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.

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  (203): I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole. http://tfl.nu/9iug
  Replies (17) Good night (1403) Bad night (3302)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..

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  (204): The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off.. http://tfl.nu/csfy
  Replies (5) Good night (3868) Bad night (1669)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would

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  (513): If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would http://tfl.nu/dfsx
  Replies (7) Good night (3614) Bad night (1029)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.

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  (360): I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true. http://tfl.nu/2syb
  Replies (33) Good night (6211) Bad night (978)
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  (619): View more from California

  Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..

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  (619): Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him.. http://tfl.nu/bqg4
  Replies (13) Good night (2971) Bad night (819)
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  (585): View more from New York

  I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.

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  (585): I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright. http://tfl.nu/bzkq
  Replies (2) Good night (656) Bad night (282)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Did you drink ALL that 151??

  (1-843): View more from South Carolina

  No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.

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  (843): Did you drink ALL that 151?? (1-843): No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable. http://tfl.nu/g9w3
  Replies (4) Good night (938) Bad night (331)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.

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  (979): Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo. http://tfl.nu/7yqz
  Replies (1) Good night (543) Bad night (299)

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