Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
