the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
