Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
